Drowning in School Advice? Here’s What Really Matters When Choosing a Primary

If you're currently exploring primary schools, you're probably knee-deep in a sea of advice — from friends, forums, WhatsApp groups, and well-meaning relatives. Everyone has a story. Everyone has an opinion. And the more you listen, the harder it gets to figure out what you think.

It's no wonder so many parents feel completely overwhelmed.

The truth is, choosing a primary school isn’t just a practical decision — it’s an emotional one. And when you’re already balancing the pressures of parenting, work, and everyday life, it can feel like this one decision will shape your child’s entire future.

Let me reassure you: it won’t.

But it is an important choice — and one that becomes much less stressful when you cut through the noise and focus on what really matters.

Here’s how.

1. Start With Your Child

The best school in the area may not be the best school for your child. Some children thrive in highly structured settings. Others need a bit more space to explore, play, and go at their own pace. Before you even look at Ofsted reports, ask yourself:

• What kind of environment helps my child feel safe?

• Do they need calm, clear routines — or more room to move and create?

• How do they respond to adults? Are they shy? Energetic? Sensitive?

When you start with them, everything else makes more sense.

The reality is, there is no universal agreement about what makes a good school or good teacher or good education. What is good for one child, is not good for another. It is values based. This is something I work through in detail in my course.

2. Filter, Don’t Absorb

It’s tempting to treat every opinion you hear as truth — especially when it comes from trusted friends or family. But their child isn’t your child. And their values may not be yours.

If you're getting overwhelmed by all the chatter, try this:

• Write down three things that matter most to you (e.g. kindness, outdoor play, diversity).

• When you hear school advice, ask: Does this speak to one of my priorities?

If not, file it under “interesting, but not relevant.”

3. Understand the Trade-Offs

No school is perfect. Some have amazing Forest School programmes but cramped buildings. Others offer a strong academic focus but less space for play. The key is understanding the trade-offs and deciding which ones you're comfortable with.

Think of it like house-hunting — you rarely get everything, but you can get the things that matter most.

4. Look Beyond the Data

League tables and Ofsted reports give you a snapshot, but they don’t tell you what it feels like to be in a school. They won’t tell you:

• Whether children are greeted warmly in the morning

• If staff speak to pupils with respect

• Whether diverse families feel included

That’s why school visits are so valuable. You can download my school visits guide for FREE here.

5. Trust Yourself

You are not imagining the pressure. The system is confusing, and the stakes feel high. But you are the expert on your child — and you don’t need to be a teacher to make a good decision.

Trust that with the right tools, a bit of structure, and a clear sense of your values, you can navigate this process confidently.

Want a bit more guidance?

My self-paced course helps parents just like you cut through the noise, understand the trade-offs, and choose a school that fits. It’s full of clear frameworks, questions to ask, and support to help you feel calmer — and more confident — every step of the way.

Learn more and sign-up here.